Gina Torres started acting when 'ethnic ambiguity was just not it.' She told Hollywood to go to hell.

Take one look at Gina Torres's Instagram and you’ll see that she’s living her best life. She’s dancing poolside with friends, showing off her washboard abs and taking on new acting projects. Ask her if this is the life she pictured for herself at 56 years old, and she’ll tell you it’s one that she hoped for but didn’t know was possible.

“I most certainly had a crisis before I turned 35,” the 9-1-1: Lone Star actress tells me during a conversation for Yahoo’s Unapologetically series. “I was working; I was doing just fine and in a position where I could take care of myself and take care of my family if I needed to.” But she didn’t know how long it would last. “They tell you that it’s going to be over soon, but it gets better.”

It’s not something her younger self would have believed as she tried to break into the industry as an Afro Latina actress. “I grew up in a community where I saw myself ... I wasn't a weirdo. Then I go into this Hollywood world where they can't fit me into any box. So I spent my 20s trying to fit into places that were not historically meant for me,” says Torres. “It really wasn't until my 30s that I was just like, Y'all can all go to hell.” And then things changed.

In her 40s, Torres booked the role of Jessica Pearson in the TV show Suits, a long-running hit that landed her her own, albeit short-lived, spin-off, Pearson. In the process, Torres became the first Afro Latina to create, produce and star in her own show.

Despite her success and outspokenness in representing her Cuban heritage, Torres still sees herself as an introvert. Here’s what she says about aging on camera, blazing trails in Hollywood — and why right now she’s happiest in her garden.

Beauty standards are something most women in the world are at war with. Were those an obstacle when you started out as a young actress?

The beauty standard is a moving target. … When I came up, ethnic ambiguity was just not it. So my 20s were hard because I just didn’t know what they wanted.

I was so consumed with what I thought people thought I should look like — where the curves should be, whether I was thin enough, whether I was curvy [enough]. … Part of that was due to my cultural orientation, because as a Latina, being softer, curvier is always great. Those are the images of women that I grew up watching; those are the women in my family. And then in the industry, it's this other thing, so [it became about] trying to figure out where my athletic body fit in all of that.

How has your perspective shifted since?

I watch [old] film of myself, because that's the blessing and the curse of aging on camera when you've been blessed with a long career, and I wish I had appreciated my body more. I look back on images and I’m like, You were just fine. There’s nothing wrong there.

I love my body now. I appreciate it more, even though it hurts in places that I really wasn't expecting it to hurt. But that's a sign of a body that's been lived in. That's a sign of a life I've been blessed to have.

Feels fair to say that being in your 50s is looking and feeling better than you thought it would …

All my friends are fine. They are well-preserved, taken-care-of sexy beasts. I love it. I will say my morning and evening routines are much longer than they used to be. So there's that.

I've always been really consistent in terms of moving my body. Fit for life, not necessarily fit for a role. I've never been a yo-yo-er, and that would never really suit me because I've always played very physical roles, so I've always had to [stay in shape]. It doesn't just look good in clothes; it just feels better.

Is it fun watching myself age? Sometimes, and sometimes no. Sometimes when the lighting is really bad, it's traumatic, quite frankly. But, again, there's a duality here because Gina at home, Gina the mom, Gina the loving partner, wakes up and goes, Yeah, I'm doing pretty damn good. I'm doing all right. And then there's the Gina Torres of it all that has to show up on the red carpet and goes, Why does it have to be so hard? People are watching. But you’ve just got to roll with it, and I'm determined to be my best self with as little intervention as possible.

Do you not enjoy getting dolled up for public appearances? Your red carpet looks are always so good!

I'm an introvert in an extroverted industry. That's part of the angst, but it is fun. Fashion is fun.

What’s your perspective on celebrity otherwise?

As actors, you're either a superstar or you're not, and nobody really tells you what the in-between is. Nobody tells you that there's so much grace in the in-between. There's so much joy. There's so much accomplishment in the person that gets to stand next to the star. There's valuable, satisfying work to be done there. So [in my 30s] I really had to look at myself and go, Wow, if it hasn't happened and if it never does, are you OK where you are? You're hitting all the marks. You're respected, you're working, you're earning a living. Is that enough? And when I answered yes, that's enough, then there's a liberation that happens, there's a freedom that happens in that. Then shortly thereafter, Suits happened. And then Suits [the reboot] happened again. You just don't know how it's all going to work out.

I had hoped for longevity. I was playing the long game. I don't have a B plan; I've never had one. … My life is the life of a creative person, so I've always seen myself doing this for as long as I could. Whether the industry responded in kind, that was something that needed to be seen and experienced.

How did you hit your “go to hell” moment?

Quite frankly, I was just pissed. I was just pissed off, and I was exhausted trying to be something that I wasn't. And so I put it down. It was really that simple. Little did I know that putting [those expectations] down would give other young women permission to do the same.

Your work became something that so many people have looked up to. Did that feel like you were taking on a responsibility to represent those who weren’t seeing themselves?

I never set out to be an activist. I set out to be an actress. I just wanted to work. Then when I started to work, I realized that there was a tremendous amount of ignorance in how people viewed me. So I was put in the position of literally defending my existence through history telling.

I guess part of the act of activism, which I was unaware of at the time, was that I never hid my culture. I never hid who I was. When asked, I was very forthright. “Yes, I'm Cuban American. Yes, both my parents are Cuban.” … I was just being me.

That created a ripple among other people like me, other actors like me, other people in the community who saw themselves in me. … I was a reflection of their own experience. That's how that happened. And I really didn't become aware of that until like 15 years ago, when that generation of actors comes up to you and goes, “Oh my God, it was so important to see you. I'm such a fan.”

Has that realization changed your approach to work at all?

No, it doesn't change my work at all. It doesn't change how I choose; it doesn't change what I do. I got here with a great deal of luck but also because of my skill set, so I don't cater any of that to speak to a particular group of people. I'm already speaking to that particular group of people. The goal, really, as an actor, as an artist, is to reach as many people as possible. To have as many people, all people, regardless of race and background and economic level, find themselves in me. … That in and of itself really becomes like the greatest act of rebellion. I'm not showing Gina Torres, the Afro Latina; it's Gina Torres the human. And I know you see yourself in me, or you can be inspired by me.

Your social media is a reflection of that. You have red carpet content and press interviews next to videos of you baking and gardening at home.

It's really important to stay sane in an insane world, especially right now. I've always been a homebody, and so my home is my sanctuary. I do everything that I can to keep that safe and humming. So I've discovered gardening, which is lovely. It's kind of crazy that this girl that grew up in a Bronx apartment actually gets to have a greenhouse. … It's all fun. I just grabbed a cucumber and a couple of peppers today, so that's very exciting.

I love to cook, I love to cook for the people that I love, and I love to bake. It's getting back to those things that make me happy because my job is extraordinary, and it takes a lot to do what I do and then to share it and share that part of myself with the world at large. That also takes a lot. So whatever I can do to bring it all back and feed my soul and take a minute is really important.

This interview has been edited for length and clarity.